Friday, February 24, 2012

The Athlete's House of the Rising Sun

Runner's Porn Site
Today, I have an affliction that is common to athletes around the world on a rest day.  It is the Athlete's  House of the Rising Sun, and it's been the ruin of many a poor boy, And God I know I'm one . . .

I am lusting after OPPA (Other People's Physical Activity).  Yep, I'm staring a you little miss jogger in the NC State Track Tank, not because you're hot, but because I want to be running down Avent Ferry Hill like you.  Yes, Boring Runner, I'm cyber stalking your blog today, and it is not because you talked about running "naked," but because you were running intervals this morning while I was making plans to clean of my cat's litter box!  And, I know that I have spent an amazingly unhealthy amount of time on a few of those websites that my wife doesn't like to see me on (because of the  fees)!  No, not the ones Charlie Sheen has bookmarked!  The Race Listing you pervs! 

Yep, I am on a rest day, and even though I am in a long term committed relationship with my training plan, my eye is wandering, and I am breathing heavy thinking about all those sexy little pieces gym equipment just waiting for me at the Y or those lovely trails out at Lake Johnson with all their curves, not to mention all the tantalizing temptation presented the more than ample hills of Umstead Park-- someone, pour a bucket of water on me!  I know that I need to stay strong and faithful to my training plan even if all we have planned is a night in front of the TV together in sweats.  Yes, this is a beautiful Friday night with all kinds of potential for the trill of a spontaneous workout fling.  I must put these lustful thoughts aside and stay true because the wandering eye the athlete will only lead me to ruin.  I keep telling myself that the short term cheap thrill is not worth the risk.  But, Lord knows I am a week man! 

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