Running Gives Proof: 10/20

**this post is about running and the role it plays in my life: I am not fishing for condolences, so please limit any comment to those about running.  I don't want to sound like an ass, but I not looking for "sorry to hear that comments"**

For the second time this month, I've turned to running as a way to deal with difficult day.  Finding solace in the rhythm of running is a significant change for me.  I've enjoyed exercise for a while now, but  many times  a bad mood or difficult day has drained me of my will to go to the gym.  Recently, however, bad days compel me to run.  I know that sitting around watching TV will not improve my mood, and there there comes a point where talking about the problem isn't going to do anymore to improve the situation.  And, sometime especially with work issues Hiro has heard it all before and has her own problems to deal with, so going for a run become a much better way to work things out .  I think that we are both better served by hitting the highlights, declaring it a crappy day, and lacing up the Sauconys to pound out a few miles.  I've given it a lot of thought as to why running provides me with such comfort.  I think it is the fact that it forces me to breath.  Breathing is so easily ignored, but the way we breath has a direct impact on our minds and our though processes.  I think that when I am running and running well my body and mind shut down all non-essential systems, which allows move past all of the stuff is weighing me down.

Wednesday was supposed to be a good day: Hiro was interviewing for a new position and I was very confident that she would get the Job because . . . well . . . she Rocks!  I was interviewing for new student workers and had a really good crop of candidates.  I just really thought it would be a good day.  All of the work stuff that we had went well, and we were just sitting around chatting when we got a text from a friend about a kitten we had picked out and were going to adopt in a few weeks.  Without getting into too much detail, the kitten wasn't doing well, and I started to worry.  Before we could contact her we got another text that he had suddenly passed away.  I was so shocked.  The fact that his life had been so brief just made me feel horrible.  And, I've been struggled recently with a lot of life/death stuff because one my co-workers suddenly passed away of a brain aneurysm last month, she had only been 42 years old.  Two days before she died I had been in her office talking with her and some of her co-workers about a 5k that I was going to run. And, just prior to that, the student worker in our office had to withdraw from school due to deaths in her family.  It is strange because all of these things have happen right at a time where running has become such an important part of my life.  Running has given me an outlet for all of the negative thoughts.  But, more importantly it has given me a stronger connection to life.  I've started to wonder if the main appeal of running is that it connects us to life so strongly.  Running makes us feel the beating of our hearts, we notice the air in our lungs.  We feel life in our bodies when we run.  Maybe that is why on a bad day now, I want nothing more than to go for a run.  I just want to prove to myself that hey I am alive and that is all that really matters.  Enjoy your life because it is a gift.  So after learning that our kitten had passed away I cried, then went for a two mile run to clear my mind.  I was still sad when I returned but felt a little better, much better than I would have if I just sat around doing nothing.